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Saturday, June 28, 2003

Discordia Update 

So I was partying with the Concordia Student Union last night. I go way back with the union's token jew, Aaron "(Mah-TAY)" Mate. My cousin declined the job of token jew last year. And then the pro-palestinian slate was defated by the (not making this up) 'Evolution not Revolution' slate. It's good to know the creationists haven't taken over or anything. Next year the pinkos can name their slate 'Actionary not Reactionary', and everyone will be even more confused.
Anyways, I was chatting with Laif, ex-VP of the union, who is currently suing Canwest for libelling him in a documentary about the Bibi riots. Very nice guy, told me I look like his little brother. So I asked him about the cartoon in the agenda, and he said it was meant to be the Israeli flag, with stripes, rather than a symbol for Judaism. Fair enough; intended as criticism of the Israeli gov't, not of the religion. Sure. But it shouldn't take chatting with Laif to find that out.
As for the agenda itself, it pissed everyone off (it was released around Sep.11, remember), including conservative Muslim students offended by the explicit sexual content. The Union president was impeached over the controversy. The next year's agenda, also named 'uprising', gave Jewish students a chance to have a say. So it's all good.
In more Laif anecdotes, apparently WTO is coming to Montreal a month from now. What better place for the controversial organization than the most left-wing province in N.America, with recent rioting history? That's like bringing the GOP convention to New York! Or the WTO to an area near Portland! Or bringing Netanyahu to Concordia! By the by, some rightwing flunkie is saying that the Republicans are convening in New York just so the insane protests will make the leftwing look bad. Should be entertaining.

Friday, June 27, 2003

Who is the real coolest dictator? 

Egerton writes in: I think the coolest dictator ever was the leader of the former
Yugoslavia, Tito. I don't really know anything about him except for his
name...but I think it is a really good name for a dictator...

One word names always rock. And he could play the drums like a motherfucker.
I'm partial to a dude in either Belarus or Uzbekistan who named the calendar months after himself and his family, i.e. March got his mom's name. Got to keep it in the fam, yo.
There's always our own Chretien, the most pernicious type of dictator: the elected kind. Sure, he may have "won" large pluralities of the "vote" for the last ten years, but everyone knows Stockwell Day actually won. I've always thought the whole dogma that says that whoever gets the most votes wins is totally unfair to the loser. There's a country (somewhere) that has totally thrown away that custom.
Anyone else have any good dictators?

Wednesday, June 25, 2003

Marx the poet 

From Nabokov's 'The Gift':
Applied Hegelianism, working gradually left, went through Feuerbach to join Marx, who in his 'Holy Family' expresses himself thus:
.....No great intelligence
Is needed to distinguish a connection
Between the teaching of materialism
Regarding inborn tendency to good
Equality of man's capacities
Capacities that are generally
Termed mental; the great influence
Exterior circumstances have on man;
....
I have put it into blank verse so that it would be less boring.

Zing to Marx.

Further proof that kim jong il is indeed the coolest dictator in the world 

Or so says Marek: here (with an all-new working link.)

The greatest blogger of my generation 

I've always loved this cliche.

Happy St.Jeanbaptiste Day, everyone! 

I went to a parade on Monday and a huge free concert last night. The parade was fairly bemusing, with a pretty apathetic audience. Worst was a group of people holding up letters. The letters kept on being blown by the wind, and as soon as some letters were held up, others were blown down. Very unreadable, leading us to say "this was a very poorly planned parade."
The concert, on the other hand, was pretty rocking. Separatists sure can party. I waved my fleur-de-lys flag while listening to some insanely anthemic French songs. It's odd to be surrounded by thousands of people passionately singing songs you've never heard and cannot understand and have political subtext. The singers were awesome. There was the Quebecois Bryan Adams, and the Quebecois Randy Bachman (who actually looked disturbingly like my dad). Then I called some singer the Quebecois Celine Dion. I thought I was being pretty funny, let me tell you. How come federalists can't rock like this?
Then three Quebecois of three generations came on stage to discuss how hard it is to be Quebecois. My trusty translator translated. One spoke of "crying through two referendums." Didn't we all. The only statement that got my goat was that "the Quebecois are the black whites of North America."
Who could forget that sad chapter in Canada's history when the Quebecois weren't allowed to vote, and had to pee in separate bathrooms? When French had to pick maple syrup for their Anglo masters? When Rene Levesque was first allowed to sit at the front of the bus (only to use it to drunkenly run over a homeless guy)?
There is a minority in Canada that has been egregiously victimized. And they've been here a lot longer than the French have. About 5,000 years longer. As far as which whiteys have had it worst, Jews and dogs weren't allowed in pools 50 years ago. The Irish weren't allowed 100 years ago. But do you hear them complaining?

Last night I saw Lester Maddox on TV 

Talking to some smart ass New York Jew
The Jew lauged at Lester Maddox
The audience laughed at Lester Maddox too
Well he may be a fool but he's our fool
If you think you're better than him you're wrong

-Randy (smart-ass Jew) Newman, "Rednecks"
Check this: he had a brief career in show business as half of an interracial musical-comedy act called "The Governor and His Dishwasher."
Just imagine.

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